Although my testimony could be summed up with the much loved words “Amazing grace, how sweet the sound, that saved a wretch like me”, there are more details I like to share. Today, I’d like to share another small part of my story. For some reason, my testimony tends to be a bit long. Maybe it’s because I cherish every single event that led up to coming to know God, and those events occurred over years. I’ve yet to write it all down; but I like to share what I can, when I can, to God’s glory.
I never tire of hearing the testimonies of others, for in them are glimpses of the power and work of God. If you have yours posted online and would like to share it, please put the link in a comment below. I would love to read it.
November 28 can never pass or even approach without me feeling a deep gratitude for my salvation. Today I celebrate the 28th anniversary of my new birth. It is no less precious to me now then when God first opened my heart to his great love, mercy, and forgiveness. On the contrary, it is more precious now. So much has happened in these past twenty-eight years; but right from the beginning of my new life in Christ, the Bible was paramount in my walk. That’s actually quite amazing considering there was a time when I use to say it was written by “a bunch of crazy old men.” Oh, what God and his word can do to a person’s heart and mind!
Before that momentous November 28 twenty-eight years ago in 1987, I spent years without faith in God. In those years I lived “free”. There were no constraints of religion or the fear of a Judge in heaven. In my mind, God didn’t exist. It’s interesting how we sometimes think that what we believe creates reality.
I remember a conversation that I had one night with my husband Butch about this very thing. Back then he was either my boyfriend or fiancé. I can’t remember. It was EONS ago! That night, Butch pointed out my faulty logic. He helped me see that I based the answer to God’s existence on my belief about it. In other words, I thought that God did not exist because I thought he did not exist. He countered this with something to the effect of, “Whether you believe in God or not has no bearing on whether he exists or not. You can sincerely believe in a non-existent god and you can deny the existence of a real God. What you believe does not create reality.”
As I grasped this concept, I cried. It was a weird, freeing cry. There was a mixture of tears of happiness and sorrow. I was happy because I realized God was still possible. Maybe, someday, I would believe. Hope and relief rolled in because it dawned on me that I was not in charge of his existence. How arrogant it is to think that one is in charge of such things! But it makes sense to me today that I would think that way because I was the center of my world.
Along with the happiness, I felt great sorrow because I didn’t have God. Why would an atheist who happily behaved as if there was no God want God? There are a lot of answers to that question.
I’ll share one. I did not believe in God but I suspected this: if he existed, he was glorious. He’d have to be. How could God be anything but? We’re talking about God! I knew that he was the supposed God of creation. Would that not mean great power and wonder? I also knew of the prospect of eternal life. If the God of the Bible was real, there was hope and great mercy for my soul, if I had one. If he existed, I suspected there was so much to him. How can one not grieve over not knowing him?
It would be a while before I came to know God – the God of the Bible and only true God – and the life changing joy that’s bound together with that, but it did happen. On November 28, 1987 God revealed his existence to me undeniably. And it was just the beginning of getting to know him. There would be so much more I would come to learn. There is still so much to learn. The Bible still instructs and guides and spurs me on to worship. I’ll never grasp all his glory while I live on this planet or tire of the precious amount I can see. How inconceivable is heaven to me, that which is full of the glory of his presence!
I don’t know how many more anniversaries of my new birth I’ll celebrate before I see him face to face, but I will celebrate each one with deep gratitude. If you know him too, I rejoice with you! If you do not, I implore you, for the sake of your soul, talk to someone who does. Please contact me if you wish. Whether or not you are able to talk to someone, you might find it possible to read the Bible. In it you will learn great things about him. He is the God of creation. He is the God of salvation. He is even more. Hesitate not to cry out to him. He is real. He does exist. He is glorious, and he can make that very, very clear.
“The Spirit Himself testifies with our spirit that we are children of God,” (Romans 8:16)
“And we know that the Son of God has come, and has given us understanding so that we may know Him who is true; and we are in Him who is true, in His Son Jesus Christ. This is the true God and eternal life.” (1 John 5:20)
“and though you have not seen Him, you love Him, and though you do not see Him now, but believe in Him, you greatly rejoice with joy inexpressible and full of glory, obtaining as the outcome of your faith the salvation of your souls.” (1 Peter 1:8-9)
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Thanks for posting your testimony. I posted mine yesterday:
http://headstickdeb.com/2015/11/27/autobiography-with-purpose-my-dirty-little-heart-and-grace/
You’re welcome, DebbieLynne. Thank you for posting your link! I will head over.
Thank you for your WONDERFUL testimony. It is a blessing for me today! I am reminded how precious my salvation is. Sometimes, in life’s rush, I forget the glorious position that Christ has given me before the Father. Thanks again for sharing!
You’re welcome, Nadine. It is a joy to share. I rejoice with you over our precious salvation.
Hi Sharon,
I do not have a blog right now, so I will share my testimony here. I came to know The Lord when I was a young teenager, back in the summer before my eighth grade year in 1996. I had grown up with parents who did not go to church, although my mom had been brought up Catholic and attended Catholic schools growing up. My real Father had attended Catholic schools too. My parents had gotten divorced when I was about four years old, and I mainly lived with my mom and step dad. I would visit my dad but he worked a lot and he had a live in girlfriend who was an emotionally abuse person at that time. I was also sexually abused by an older male neighbor when I was around the age of 8.
I was depressed growing up as you can imagine. I would have crying spells, couldn’t control it sometimes. I became obsessive about my weight and was anorexic to a degree in middle school, thereby getting to my coveted size 0 in seventh grade. By then, I had started to curse and was going towards a dark future. My mom saw my worry and depression and tried to help me with self help ideology (ie Tony Robbins). It didn’t help my feelings of utter loneliness, hopelessness, and fear, just dark hopelessness was what I felt which drove me to crying jags.
But! God! He was preparing my heart to seek for Him. My older sister had started going to a church for a couple of years and when we had moved again, I think it was about the fourth time, she stared going to a church where I live now. She kept inviting me to come, but I would not. She was persistent though. She had people praying for me too. We had been through a lot together, and she wanted for me to be saved too. I finally came to youth events, but not big church. I heard the Gospel from my sister for the first time in sixth grade. I heard it again and again until I finally understood what it meant that summer before eighty grade. That was when I prayed for Christ to be my Lord and Savior. It was amazing! I had joy, and I was so interested in reading the Scriptures to fully understand what had happened to me and who I was now. A new creation. The old had passed away, and the new me had come, and I really wanted a new life! He has brought me through a whole lot since then, and He still is and always will be my only Hope!:)
Katiegfromtennessee
Katie, thank you so much for sharing your testimony. It’s very touching. You’ve gone through a lot. The joy you have is a testimony. I rejoice with you over your new birth even though it happened years ago. I thank God for it… and for your sister and her faith too.